⌜Enter⌝ Valentine ⌜and⌝ Proteus.VALENTINE Cease to persuade, my loving Proteus. Home-keeping youth have ever homely wits. Were ’t not affection chains thy tender days To the sweet glances of thy honored love,5 I rather would entreat thy company To see the wonders of the world abroad Than, living dully sluggardized at home, Wear out thy youth with shapeless idleness. But since thou lov’st, love still and thrive therein,10 Even as I would when I to love begin.PROTEUS Wilt thou be gone? Sweet Valentine, adieu. Think on thy Proteus when thou haply seest Some rare noteworthy object in thy travel. Wish me partaker in thy happiness15 When thou dost meet good hap; and in thy danger, If ever danger do environ thee, Commend thy grievance to my holy prayers, For I will be thy beadsman, Valentine.VALENTINE And on a love-book pray for my success?PROTEUS 20 Upon some book I love I’ll pray for thee.
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The Two Gentlemen of Verona
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VALENTINE That’s on some shallow story of deep love, How young Leander crossed the Hellespont.PROTEUS That’s a deep story of a deeper love, For he was more than over shoes in love.VALENTINE 25 ’Tis true, for you are over boots in love, And yet you never swam the Hellespont.PROTEUS Over the boots? Nay, give me not the boots.VALENTINE No, I will not, for it boots thee not.PROTEUS What?VALENTINE 30 To be in love, where scorn is bought with groans, Coy looks with heart-sore sighs, one fading moment’s mirth With twenty watchful, weary, tedious nights; If haply won, perhaps a hapless gain;35 If lost, why then a grievous labor won; How ever, but a folly bought with wit, Or else a wit by folly vanquishèd.PROTEUS So, by your circumstance, you call me fool.VALENTINE So, by your circumstance, I fear you’ll prove.PROTEUS 40 ’Tis love you cavil at; I am not Love.VALENTINE Love is your master, for he masters you; And he that is so yokèd by a fool Methinks should not be chronicled for wise.PROTEUS Yet writers say: as in the sweetest bud
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The Two Gentlemen of Verona
ACT 1. SC. 1
45 The eating canker dwells, so eating love Inhabits in the finest wits of all.VALENTINE And writers say: as the most forward bud Is eaten by the canker ere it blow, Even so by love the young and tender wit50 Is turned to folly, blasting in the bud, Losing his verdure, even in the prime, And all the fair effects of future hopes. But wherefore waste I time to counsel thee That art a votary to fond desire?55 Once more adieu. My father at the road Expects my coming, there to see me shipped.PROTEUS And thither will I bring thee, Valentine.VALENTINE Sweet Proteus, no. Now let us take our leave. To Milan let me hear from thee by letters60 Of thy success in love, and what news else Betideth here in absence of thy friend. And I likewise will visit thee with mine.PROTEUS All happiness bechance to thee in Milan.VALENTINE As much to you at home. And so farewell.He exits.PROTEUS 65 He after honor hunts, I after love. He leaves his friends, to dignify them more; I ⌜leave⌝ myself, my friends, and all, for love. Thou, Julia, thou hast metamorphosed me, Made me neglect my studies, lose my time,70 War with good counsel, set the world at nought; Made wit with musing weak, heart sick with thought.⌜Enter⌝ Speed.
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The Two Gentlemen of Verona
ACT 1. SC. 1
SPEED Sir Proteus, ’save you. Saw you my master?PROTEUS But now he parted hence to embark for Milan.SPEED Twenty to one, then, he is shipped already,75 And I have played the sheep in losing him.PROTEUS Indeed a sheep doth very often stray, An if the shepherd be awhile away.SPEED You conclude that my master is a shepherd, then, and I ⌜a⌝ sheep?PROTEUS 80I do.SPEED Why, then my horns are his horns, whether I wake or sleep.PROTEUS A silly answer, and fitting well a sheep.SPEED This proves me still a sheep.PROTEUS 85True, and thy master a shepherd.SPEED Nay, that I can deny by a circumstance.PROTEUS It shall go hard but I’ll prove it by another.SPEED The shepherd seeks the sheep, and not the sheep the shepherd; but I seek my master, and my90 master seeks not me. Therefore I am no sheep.PROTEUS The sheep for fodder follow the shepherd; the shepherd for food follows not the sheep. Thou for wages followest thy master; thy master for wages follows not thee. Therefore thou art a sheep.SPEED 95Such another proof will make me cry “baa.”PROTEUS But dost thou hear? Gav’st thou my letter to Julia?SPEED Ay, sir. I, a lost mutton, gave your letter to her, a laced mutton, and she, a laced mutton, gave me, a100 lost mutton, nothing for my labor.PROTEUS Here’s too small a pasture for such store of muttons.
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The Two Gentlemen of Verona
ACT 1. SC. 1
SPEED If the ground be overcharged, you were best stick her.PROTEUS 105Nay, in that you are astray; ’twere best pound you.SPEED Nay, sir, less than a pound shall serve me for carrying your letter.PROTEUS You mistake; I mean the pound, a pinfold.SPEED 110 From a pound to a pin? Fold it over and over, ’Tis threefold too little for carrying a letter to your lover.PROTEUS But what said she?SPEED, ⌜nodding⌝ Ay.PROTEUS 115Nod—“Ay.” Why, that’s “noddy.”SPEED You mistook, sir. I say she did nod, and you ask me if she did nod, and I say “ay.”PROTEUS And that set together is “noddy.”SPEED Now you have taken the pains to set it together,120 take it for your pains.PROTEUS No, no, you shall have it for bearing the letter.SPEED Well, I perceive I must be fain to bear with you.PROTEUS Why, sir, how do you bear with me?SPEED Marry, sir, the letter, very orderly, having nothing125 but the word “noddy” for my pains.PROTEUS Beshrew me, but you have a quick wit.SPEED And yet it cannot overtake your slow purse.PROTEUS Come, come, open the matter in brief. What said she?SPEED 130Open your purse, that the money and the matter may be both at once delivered.PROTEUS, ⌜giving money⌝ Well, sir, here is for your pains. What said she?SPEED, ⌜looking at the money⌝ Truly, sir, I think you’ll135 hardly win her.PROTEUS Why? Couldst thou perceive so much from her?
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The Two Gentlemen of Verona
ACT 1. SC. 2
SPEED Sir, I could perceive nothing at all from her, no, not so much as a ducat for delivering your letter.140 And being so hard to me that brought your mind, I fear she’ll prove as hard to you in telling your mind. Give her no token but stones, for she’s as hard as steel.PROTEUS What said she? Nothing?SPEED 145No, not so much as “Take this for thy pains.” To testify your bounty, I thank you, you have ⌜testerned⌝ me. In requital whereof, henceforth carry your letters yourself. And so, sir, I’ll commend you to my master.PROTEUS 150 Go, go, begone, to save your ship from wrack, Which cannot perish having thee aboard, Being destined to a drier death on shore.⌜Speed exits.⌝ I must go send some better messenger. I fear my Julia would not deign my lines,155 Receiving them from such a worthless post.He exits.