Enter Hero and two gentlewomen, Margaret and Ursula.HERO Good Margaret, run thee to the parlor. There shalt thou find my cousin Beatrice Proposing with the Prince and Claudio. Whisper her ear and tell her I and Ursula5 Walk in the orchard, and our whole discourse Is all of her. Say that thou overheardst us, And bid her steal into the pleachèd bower Where honeysuckles ripened by the sun Forbid the sun to enter, like favorites,10 Made proud by princes, that advance their pride Against that power that bred it. There will she hide her To listen our propose. This is thy office. Bear thee well in it, and leave us alone.MARGARET 15 I’ll make her come, I warrant you, presently.⌜She exits.⌝HERO Now, Ursula, when Beatrice doth come, As we do trace this alley up and down, Our talk must only be of Benedick. When I do name him, let it be thy part20 To praise him more than ever man did merit.
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My talk to thee must be how Benedick Is sick in love with Beatrice. Of this matter Is little Cupid’s crafty arrow made, That only wounds by hearsay. Now begin,25 For look where Beatrice like a lapwing runs Close by the ground, to hear our conference.Enter Beatrice, ⌜who hides in the bower.⌝URSULA, ⌜aside to Hero⌝ The pleasant’st angling is to see the fish Cut with her golden oars the silver stream And greedily devour the treacherous bait.30 So angle we for Beatrice, who even now Is couchèd in the woodbine coverture. Fear you not my part of the dialogue.HERO, ⌜aside to Ursula⌝ Then go we near her, that her ear lose nothing Of the false sweet bait that we lay for it.—⌜They walk near the bower.⌝35 No, truly, Ursula, she is too disdainful. I know her spirits are as coy and wild As haggards of the rock.URSULA But are you sure That Benedick loves Beatrice so entirely?HERO 40 So says the Prince and my new-trothèd lord.URSULA And did they bid you tell her of it, madam?HERO They did entreat me to acquaint her of it, But I persuaded them, if they loved Benedick, To wish him wrestle with affection45 And never to let Beatrice know of it.URSULA Why did you so? Doth not the gentleman
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Deserve as full as fortunate a bed As ever Beatrice shall couch upon?HERO O god of love! I know he doth deserve50 As much as may be yielded to a man, But Nature never framed a woman’s heart Of prouder stuff than that of Beatrice. Disdain and scorn ride sparkling in her eyes, Misprizing what they look on, and her wit55 Values itself so highly that to her All matter else seems weak. She cannot love, Nor take no shape nor project of affection, She is so self-endeared.URSULA Sure, I think so,60 And therefore certainly it were not good She knew his love, lest she’ll make sport at it.HERO Why, you speak truth. I never yet saw man, How wise, how noble, young, how rarely featured, But she would spell him backward. If fair-faced,65 She would swear the gentleman should be her sister; If black, why, Nature, drawing of an antic, Made a foul blot; if tall, a lance ill-headed; If low, an agate very vilely cut;70 If speaking, why, a vane blown with all winds; If silent, why, a block moved with none. So turns she every man the wrong side out, And never gives to truth and virtue that Which simpleness and merit purchaseth.URSULA 75 Sure, sure, such carping is not commendable.HERO No, not to be so odd and from all fashions As Beatrice is cannot be commendable. But who dare tell her so? If I should speak,
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She would mock me into air. O, she would laugh80 me Out of myself, press me to death with wit. Therefore let Benedick, like covered fire, Consume away in sighs, waste inwardly. It were a better death than die with mocks,85 Which is as bad as die with tickling.URSULA Yet tell her of it. Hear what she will say.HERO No, rather I will go to Benedick And counsel him to fight against his passion; And truly I’ll devise some honest slanders90 To stain my cousin with. One doth not know How much an ill word may empoison liking.URSULA O, do not do your cousin such a wrong! She cannot be so much without true judgment, Having so swift and excellent a wit95 As she is prized to have, as to refuse So rare a gentleman as Signior Benedick.HERO He is the only man of Italy, Always excepted my dear Claudio.URSULA I pray you be not angry with me, madam,100 Speaking my fancy: Signior Benedick, For shape, for bearing, argument, and valor, Goes foremost in report through Italy.HERO Indeed, he hath an excellent good name.URSULA His excellence did earn it ere he had it.105 When are you married, madam?HERO Why, every day, tomorrow. Come, go in.
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I’ll show thee some attires and have thy counsel Which is the best to furnish me tomorrow.⌜They move away from the bower.⌝URSULA, ⌜aside to Hero⌝ She’s limed, I warrant you. We have caught her,110 madam.HERO, ⌜aside to Ursula⌝ If it prove so, then loving goes by haps; Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps.⌜Hero and Ursula exit.⌝BEATRICE, ⌜coming forward⌝ What fire is in mine ears? Can this be true? Stand I condemned for pride and scorn so much?115 Contempt, farewell, and maiden pride, adieu! No glory lives behind the back of such. And Benedick, love on; I will requite thee, Taming my wild heart to thy loving hand. If thou dost love, my kindness shall incite thee120 To bind our loves up in a holy band. For others say thou dost deserve, and I Believe it better than reportingly.She exits.
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