Alarums. Matthew Gough is slain, and all the rest.
Then enter Jack Cade with his company.CADE So, sirs. Now go some and pull down the Savoy; others to th’ Inns of Court. Down with them all!DICK I have a suit unto your Lordship.CADE Be it a lordship, thou shalt have it for that word.DICK 5Only that the laws of England may come out of your mouth.HOLLAND, ⌜aside⌝ Mass, ’twill be sore law, then, for he was thrust in the mouth with a spear, and ’tis not whole yet.SMITH, ⌜aside⌝ 10Nay, John, it will be stinking law, for his breath stinks with eating toasted cheese.CADE I have thought upon it; it shall be so. Away! Burn all the records of the realm. My mouth shall be the Parliament of England.HOLLAND, ⌜aside⌝ 15Then we are like to have biting statutes—unless his teeth be pulled out.CADE And henceforward all things shall be in common.Enter a Messenger.MESSENGER My lord, a prize, a prize! Here’s the Lord20 Saye, which sold the towns in France, he that made us pay one-and-twenty fifteens, and one shilling to the pound, the last subsidy.Enter George with the Lord Saye.CADE Well, he shall be beheaded for it ten times.—Ah, thou say, thou serge, nay, thou buckram lord, now25 art thou within point-blank of our jurisdiction regal. What canst thou answer to my Majesty for giving up of Normandy unto Monsieur Basimecu, the Dauphin of France? Be it known unto thee by
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these presence, even the presence of Lord Mortimer,30 that I am the besom that must sweep the court clean of such filth as thou art. Thou hast most traitorously corrupted the youth of the realm in erecting a grammar school; and whereas, before, our forefathers had no other books but the35 score and the tally, thou hast caused printing to be used, and, contrary to the King his crown and dignity, thou hast built a paper mill. It will be proved to thy face that thou hast men about thee that usually talk of a noun and a verb and such abominable40 words as no Christian ear can endure to hear. Thou hast appointed justices of peace to call poor men before them about matters they were not able to answer. Moreover, thou hast put them in prison; and, because they could not read, thou hast45 hanged them, when indeed only for that cause they have been most worthy to live. Thou dost ride ⌜on⌝ a footcloth, dost thou not?SAYE What of that?CADE Marry, thou oughtst not to let thy horse wear a50 cloak when honester men than thou go in their hose and doublets.DICK And work in their shirt too—as myself, for example, that am a butcher.SAYE You men of Kent—DICK 55What say you of Kent?SAYE Nothing but this: ’tis bona terra, mala gens.CADE Away with him, away with him! He speaks Latin.SAYE Hear me but speak, and bear me where you will.60 Kent, in the commentaries Caesar writ, Is termed the civil’st place of all this isle. Sweet is the country, because full of riches; The people liberal, valiant, active, wealthy;
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Which makes me hope you are not void of pity.65 I sold not Maine; I lost not Normandy; Yet to recover them would lose my life. Justice with favor have I always done; Prayers and tears have moved me; gifts could never. When have I aught exacted at your hands70 Kent to maintain, the King, the realm, and you? Large gifts have I bestowed on learnèd clerks, Because my book preferred me to the King. And seeing ignorance is the curse of God, Knowledge the wing wherewith we fly to heaven,75 Unless you be possessed with devilish spirits, You cannot but forbear to murder me. This tongue hath parleyed unto foreign kings For your behoof—CADE Tut, when struck’st thou one blow in the field?SAYE 80 Great men have reaching hands. Oft have I struck Those that I never saw, and struck them dead.GEORGE O monstrous coward! What, to come behind folks?SAYE These cheeks are pale for watching for your good.CADE 85Give him a box o’ th’ ear, and that will make ’em red again.SAYE Long sitting to determine poor men’s causes Hath made me full of sickness and diseases.CADE You shall have a hempen ⌜caudle,⌝ then, and90 the help of hatchet.DICK Why dost thou quiver, man?SAYE The palsy, and not fear, provokes me.CADE Nay, he nods at us, as who should say “I’ll be even with you.” I’ll see if his head will stand steadier95 on a pole, or no. Take him away, and behead him.
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SAYE Tell me, wherein have I offended most? Have I affected wealth or honor? Speak. Are my chests filled up with extorted gold?100 Is my apparel sumptuous to behold? Whom have I injured, that you seek my death? These hands are free from guiltless blood-shedding, This breast from harboring foul deceitful thoughts. O, let me live!CADE 105I feel remorse in myself with his words, but I’ll bridle it. He shall die, an it be but for pleading so well for his life. Away with him! He has a familiar under his tongue; he speaks not i’ God’s name. Go, take him away, I say, and strike off his head110 presently; and then break into his son-in-law’s house, Sir James Cromer, and strike off his head; and bring them both upon two poles hither.ALL It shall be done.SAYE Ah, countrymen, if when you make your prayers,115 God should be so obdurate as yourselves, How would it fare with your departed souls? And therefore yet relent, and save my life.CADE Away with him, and do as I command you.⌜Some exit with Lord Saye.⌝ The proudest peer in the realm shall not wear a120 head on his shoulders unless he pay me tribute. There shall not a maid be married but she shall pay to me her maidenhead ere they have it. Men shall hold of me in capite; and we charge and command that their wives be as free as heart can wish125 or tongue can tell.DICK My lord, when shall we go to Cheapside and take up commodities upon our bills?CADE Marry, presently.ALL O, brave!
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Enter one with the heads ⌜of Lord Saye and Sir James
Cromer on poles.⌝CADE 130But is not this braver? Let them kiss one another, for they loved well when they were alive. ⌜The
heads are brought together.⌝ Now part them again, lest they consult about the giving up of some more towns in France. Soldiers, defer the spoil of the135 city until night, for, with these borne before us instead of maces, will we ride through the streets and at every corner have them kiss. Away!He exits ⌜with his company.⌝