Enter Bevis and John Holland ⌜with staves.⌝BEVIS Come, and get thee a sword, though made of a lath. They have been up these two days.HOLLAND They have the more need to sleep now, then.BEVIS I tell thee, Jack Cade the clothier means to dress5 the commonwealth, and turn it, and set a new nap upon it.HOLLAND So he had need, for ’tis threadbare. Well, I say, it was never merry world in England since gentlemen came up.BEVIS 10O miserable age! Virtue is not regarded in handicraftsmen.HOLLAND The nobility think scorn to go in leather aprons.BEVIS Nay, more, the King’s Council are no good15 workmen.HOLLAND True, and yet it is said “Labor in thy vocation,” which is as much to say as “Let the magistrates be laboring men.” And therefore should we be magistrates.BEVIS 20Thou hast hit it, for there’s no better sign of a brave mind than a hard hand.HOLLAND I see them, I see them! There’s Best’s son, the tanner of Wingham—BEVIS He shall have the skins of our enemies to make25 dog’s leather of.HOLLAND And Dick the butcher—BEVIS Then is sin struck down like an ox, and iniquity’s throat cut like a calf.
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HOLLAND And Smith the weaver.BEVIS 30Argo, their thread of life is spun.HOLLAND Come, come, let’s fall in with them.Drum. Enter Cade, Dick ⌜the⌝ butcher, Smith the
weaver, and a Sawyer, with infinite numbers,
⌜all with staves.⌝CADE We, John Cade, so termed of our supposed father—DICK, ⌜aside⌝ Or rather of stealing a cade of herrings.CADE 35For our enemies shall ⌜fall⌝ before us, inspired with the spirit of putting down kings and princes— command silence.DICK Silence!CADE My father was a Mortimer—DICK, ⌜aside⌝ 40He was an honest man and a good bricklayer.CADE My mother a Plantagenet—DICK, ⌜aside⌝ I knew her well; she was a midwife.CADE My wife descended of the Lacys.DICK, ⌜aside⌝ 45She was indeed a peddler’s daughter, and sold many laces.SMITH, ⌜aside⌝ But now of late, not able to travel with her furred pack, she washes bucks here at home.CADE Therefore am I of an honorable house.DICK, ⌜aside⌝ 50Ay, by my faith, the field is honorable; and there was he born, under a hedge, for his father had never a house but the cage.CADE Valiant I am—SMITH, ⌜aside⌝ He must needs, for beggary is valiant.CADE 55I am able to endure much—DICK, ⌜aside⌝ No question of that; for I have seen him whipped three market-days together.CADE I fear neither sword nor fire.SMITH, ⌜aside⌝ He need not fear the sword, for his coat60 is of proof.
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DICK, ⌜aside⌝ But methinks he should stand in fear of fire, being burnt i’ th’ hand for stealing of sheep.CADE Be brave, then, for your captain is brave and vows reformation. There shall be in England seven65 halfpenny loaves sold for a penny. The three-hooped pot shall have ten hoops, and I will make it felony to drink small beer. All the realm shall be in common, and in Cheapside shall my palfrey go to grass. And when I am king, as king I will be—ALL 70God save your Majesty!CADE I thank you, good people.—There shall be no money; all shall eat and drink on my score; and I will apparel them all in one livery, that they may agree like brothers and worship me their lord.DICK 75The first thing we do, let’s kill all the lawyers.CADE Nay, that I mean to do. Is not this a lamentable thing, that of the skin of an innocent lamb should be made parchment? That parchment, being scribbled o’er, should undo a man? Some say the bee80 stings, but I say, ’tis the beeswax; for I did but seal once to a thing, and I was never mine own man since. How now? Who’s there?Enter a Clerk ⌜of Chartham, under guard.⌝SMITH The clerk of Chartham. He can write and read and cast account.CADE 85O, monstrous!SMITH We took him setting of boys’ copies.CADE Here’s a villain!SMITH H’as a book in his pocket with red letters in ’t.CADE Nay, then, he is a conjurer.DICK 90Nay, he can make obligations and write court hand.CADE I am sorry for ’t. The man is a proper man, of mine honor. Unless I find him guilty, he shall not
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die.—Come hither, sirrah; I must examine thee.95 What is thy name?CLERK Emmanuel.DICK They use to write it on the top of letters.—’Twill go hard with you.CADE Let me alone.—Dost thou use to write thy100 name? Or hast thou a mark to thyself, like ⌜an⌝ honest, plain-dealing man?CLERK Sir, I thank God, I have been so well brought up that I can write my name.ALL He hath confessed. Away with him! He’s a villain105 and a traitor.CADE Away with him, I say! Hang him with his pen and inkhorn about his neck.One exits with the Clerk.Enter Michael.MICHAEL Where’s our general?CADE Here I am, thou particular fellow.MICHAEL 110Fly, fly, fly! Sir Humphrey Stafford and his brother are hard by, with the King’s forces.CADE Stand, villain, stand, or I’ll fell thee down. He shall be encountered with a man as good as himself. He is but a knight, is he?MICHAEL 115No.CADE To equal him I will make myself a knight presently. ⌜He kneels.⌝ Rise up Sir John Mortimer. ⌜He rises.⌝ Now have at him!Enter Sir Humphrey Stafford and his Brother, with
⌜a Herald,⌝ Drum, and Soldiers.STAFFORD Rebellious hinds, the filth and scum of Kent,120 Marked for the gallows, lay your weapons down! Home to your cottages; forsake this groom. The King is merciful, if you revolt.
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BROTHER But angry, wrathful, and inclined to blood, If you go forward. Therefore yield, or die.CADE 125 As for these silken-coated slaves, I pass not. It is to you, good people, that I speak, Over whom, in time to come, I hope to reign, For I am rightful heir unto the crown.STAFFORD Villain, thy father was a plasterer,130 And thou thyself a shearman, art thou not?CADE And Adam was a gardener.BROTHER And what of that?CADE Marry, this: Edmund Mortimer, Earl of March, Married the Duke of Clarence’ daughter, did he not?STAFFORD 135Ay, sir.CADE By her he had two children at one birth.BROTHER That’s false.CADE Ay, there’s the question. But I say ’tis true. The elder of them, being put to nurse,140 Was by a beggar-woman stol’n away, And, ignorant of his birth and parentage, Became a bricklayer when he came to age. His son am I. Deny it if you can.DICK Nay, ’tis too true. Therefore he shall be king.SMITH 145Sir, he made a chimney in my father’s house, and the bricks are alive at this day to testify it. Therefore deny it not.STAFFORD And will you credit this base drudge’s words, That speaks he knows not what?
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ALL 150 Ay, marry, will we. Therefore get you gone.BROTHER Jack Cade, the Duke of York hath taught you this.CADE He lies, ⌜aside⌝ for I invented it myself.—Go to, sirrah. Tell the King from me that, for his father’s sake, Henry the Fifth, in whose time boys went to155 span-counter for French crowns, I am content he shall reign, but I’ll be Protector over him.DICK And, furthermore, we’ll have the Lord Saye’s head for selling the dukedom of Maine.CADE And good reason: for thereby is England mained160 and fain to go with a staff, but that my puissance holds it up. Fellow kings, I tell you that that Lord Saye hath gelded the commonwealth and made it an eunuch; and, more than that, he can speak French, and therefore he is a traitor.STAFFORD 165 O, gross and miserable ignorance!CADE Nay, answer if you can. The Frenchmen are our enemies. Go to, then, I ask but this: can he that speaks with the tongue of an enemy be a good counselor, or no?ALL 170No, no, and therefore we’ll have his head!BROTHER, ⌜to Stafford⌝ Well, seeing gentle words will not prevail, Assail them with the army of the King.STAFFORD Herald, away, and throughout every town Proclaim them traitors that are up with Cade,175 That those which fly before the battle ends May, even in their wives’ and children’s sight Be hanged up for example at their doors.— And you that be the King’s friends, follow me.⌜The Staffords, Soldiers, and Herald⌝ exit.
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CADE And you that love the Commons, follow me.180 Now show yourselves men. ’Tis for liberty! We will not leave one lord, one gentleman; Spare none but such as go in clouted shoon, For they are thrifty, honest men and such As would, but that they dare not, take our parts.DICK 185They are all in order and march toward us.CADE But then are we in order when we are most out of order. Come, march forward.⌜They exit.⌝